Losing.

I am a girl built with infinite insecurities,
very aware of my strength and weaknesses,
but not know how to play them yet.
I'll succeed with flying colors or end in mass destruction
Which one will it be,
I do not dare place bet.
For the future seemed so bright from a far distance.
Yet up close so dim... so hopeless and fearful.
To an extent which I could not bear
with my weak and frail shoulders.
A burden of hope I could not wear,
from all those who surround me and
their faith keeps me awake till dawn.
And I start praying to all the Gods
that I do not disappoint them.
As they have never disappointed me.
It's a feeling of desperation,
thinking I'm not good enough for this society.
Suppose if I drop a class,
life would be an easier glass to drink from.
Ask me of a love song and I'll scribble up in three.
But ask me of number I could never answer,
See we all have our own specialties so they tell me.
How can I survive if that's what survival be.
I don't care about lots of money I just want to be at peace.
Where I can sing and have a pen to write
where my thoughts can run free.
For my imagination breaks chains,
while my brains do not. 
Tell me someone tell me,
Do I fight or have I fought,
but lost.

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